Somewhere to begin, somewhere... to rely on

Don't we are like children sometimes?
Tonight I imagined I woke up this morning and said "I want my past". It's so bad to have such a mental trip backwards. It's not because bad memories, it is because so many good things, so many experiences that won't happen again ever... And I'm so sorry, and I'm not so sorry. All people say you cannot stick to the past... true. Neither to the future... true... again. So what "normal people" suggest is to stick to the present. I do not think it's bad, actually I do agree to stick to the present, but days seem to me go so fast that I can't even stick to a moment that will be gone few minutes later. So in the "secuence of reality" what does the real movie present to us? What does life tell us concerning "present"? Our everyday? I miss some everyday of my past, but when I compare it to my "everyday" of today, then it's even someway better. It's like a puzzle of good moments through our lives. Oh oh oh this is getting so complicated tonight. Maybe so many ideas are sailing over this surface...
But to continue... then what's happiness? If we cannot stick to past or future? when present is continiously gone...
I heard happiness is the sum of good moments or just one moment. Happiness can be reached by only a single moment and it lasts ... seconds! minutes! Not even hours! It's so sad... but it's true. Then we get in the normal human skin we have and maybe we are not prepared to live in "happiness" we need those bittersweet things that push us to enjoy happiness as it "should be enjoyed". Anyone can have a "happiness" theory, our minds are so great and huge... But it was my concern tonight. Where is time in our mental, physical or sentimental perception? How to deal with good times, memories, and time? Put them in a mixer. Then what do you feel? think? do?
How many times a day you ask yourself how happy you are? How many times a month you think you love your friends? your family? someone else? How strong is our connection to those dark corners in our brain?
Then I was again thinking how much time I'm missing to give a call, to fix some things at home, to finish some work....
It's so funny some things are delayed, some others are gone, some others need more time.
And I still ask myself... Where is time going?
Or it's maybe I need to watch that movie my flatmate suggested...
Sometimes answers come unexpected, in a book, in a movie... in someone talking next to you on the train.
Ok, then I'm looking forward to it. To run after time....
I wish I'm in time, to get my answers of course...